In His Own Time

He is risen, He is risen indeed! Easter Sunday started out wonderful by having daddy home, the kids seeing their Easter baskets and a wonderful message reminding us of the facts surrounding the resurrection of Christ. It was also wonderful to be back with the body of Christ this morning at our church. These people are like family to us - loving, supporting, praying and encouraging us while we walk this road with our son. Our parents allowed us that opportunity and we are grateful.

Yesterday John Asher was showing his funny, sweet self. I guess he wore himself out because he's not having such a great day today. My visit with John Asher earlier this afternoon was a little disheartening. I was looking forward to seeing my little guy smiling and laughing, like the video Jeremiah took yesterday. Instead I walked in to see a sleeping but fidgety baby having irregular heartbeats and a nurse frustrated by not knowing the cause. Mary Beth is his nurse today and she is quite amazing! We love her and she works tirelessly when she is on call. John Asher has been very lucky to have her and she did all she could today to help control his heart rate. He had a blood transfusion to increase his hemoglobin which carries oxygen throughout his body. She also changed his meds around to see what would regulate his heart. She has been a nurse a long time and she said he is acting just like TOF babies use to act after having surgery many years ago when they operated on kids between the ages of 12 – 18 months. She believes that in his own time he will come around and his heart will regulate itself. When? She says that is like looking into a crystal ball. Well I don't believe in crystal balls, but I do believe in a God who heals in His own time.

Let's just stop a minute and be real. This momma is aching to hold her baby boy. She is ready to have her family back together; she is ready to begin the "new normal". And I know that in time, that will all happen. I know that we are lucky in that our boy will come home and have a normal, healthy life, and there are reminders all around me that we are some of the few that are just that lucky. However, this is still hard.

Tomorrow I will have the opportunity to visit a lot more with John Asher. At the last minute, all three of my children decided to go home with Grandma and Papa. God bless them! I didn't have to ask either party or force my kids to go. They willingly went and that made it much easier on this momma's heart. I will probably pick them up late Tuesday evening so I have some time to visit John Asher as well as get back to the house to accomplish some tasks that are a lot little harder with them around. This will also provide the kids with a good distraction from our current reality.

I humbly ask you to continue to pray for John Asher's heart, for it to continue to regulate itself as it learns how to operate in a new "normal" way. As of now, we are still looking at several more days in CICU. So we ask you to pray for Jeremiah and I as we deal with the emotions this brings and for our kids as they also try to understand what is going on.