Thursday, April 24, 2008
North vs South
I had an interesting conversation with a group of women tonight at dinner. One lady is from Australia and she found it interesting that when they lived up North they were invited into peoples homes more times in one year than they have in the seven years they've lived in the South. Another lady pointed out that it is probably because here in the south we feel like there are certain standards to live by. Therefore if we don't have a nice, large home in the perfect neighborhood, decorated according to Southern Living magazine we won't invite people over. If we do, the home must be immaculate, the food presented beautifully and tasting perfect, and just the right hospitality and entertainment for our guests. At first I thought this was a little extreme, until I realized that I do not invite others into my home because it is too small, not decorated as nice as some others I have been in (although I do my best and I think it is cute). I worry about where everyone will sit to eat, or if I have enough platters to display the food, or if my guests will be bored. I am so worried about meeting the standards and the expectations so much that I am missing out on some Big blessings by inviting others in. Several ladies told stories about how in other countries that invite others over so that their is standing room only and everyone has a wonderful time! But here, we are so concerned about the material things that we are missing out on what the Lord wants us to see, and that is matters of the heart! He tells us to set our minds on things above, not on earthly things. We should be focusing on the person in our home, not on how our home should please that person. Let me confess that I have missed out on many opportunities to invite people, strangers and close friends alike, into my home because I was concerned that my home wasn't good enough or didn't meet someones expectations. I have been convicted tonight about this. It will still be a struggle as we Southern girls are raised to meet certain expectations. But God isn't a "Southern" God and he just wants to use us to minister to others in need. I pray that the Lord will continue to work in my heart in this area of pride and discontent....
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3 comments:
I've noticed this too- for us it was the difference between the northeast and the midwest. Here in the northeast, we just don't invite people over because everyone likes to be left alone! :) New Englanders are not known to be warm and fuzzy. Or hospitable- at all.
When we moved to the midwest, the first day we went to Gym Class for my son, we met a family who lived there and they invited us over to dinner. We thought they were weirdos or had some bad motives or something! Why on EARTH would you invite perfect strangers over to dinner? :) But, no, they were just typical midwesterners- super hospitable and friendly- and they became our closest friends while we lived there!!
So, we learned our lesson, and when a family arrived at our church last August having just moved from Indiana, I knew they probably felt REALLY alone, so we invited them over- the same day- GASP!!! But, they are our closest friends now!
I think this is a hard concept to fully understand if you've never lived in another region of the country. I just never realized before living away that even Americans are totally different depending on where you live. For us, moving away taught us a lot about the importance of hospitality and reaching out to people!
Well said although my excuse is busyness or lazyness, either way I need help. I cannot change what I have but I just pray I can get it together agin. I miss having the girls over. I have missed many opportunities to minister too.
We cannot put our faith in man as he will only hurt us and let us down. We need to focus on the Lord and we can get it together. Satan knows who to put in our path and our insecurities to make us feel shame and guilt. We need to learn to put our pride behind us and ask for help when we become overwhelmed. It is about simple hospitality, stopping and being Mary instead of Martha. Instead of being overwhelmed and throwing in the towel take it day by day. In some ways I am a perfectionist, except when I feel I can not do it perfect I give up.
Skipping a season of activies and focusing on the home will be pleasing to the Lord, not hurry, hurry, hurry all the time. I want my kids to remember good times at home and good meals around the table and to be proud to invite their friends so that they, too, can minister.
I ask for prayer for my busyness, laziness and perfectionism, all sins that take me away from the Lord, instead of drawing me and others closer to him.
Hey, Robyn, I tagged you on my blog. I'm looking forward to hearing some random facts about you.....some of which I'm sure we'll have in common since we seem to be so much alike. :) Read my blog post for today for the directions.
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