Reflections

Today is Wednesday, August 2. In three days I will be thirty. I don't really know what to think about it. For the past two years I have been anticipating my thirtieth birthday, knowing that my dossier can arrive in China meeting the age requirement. But with the USCIS slowdown in processing my paperwork, all my ideas about when my documents would arrive in China have changed. But isn't that kind of how we want it, not our way but God's. On many occasions I have felt him telling me, 'See what you have done Robyn, now let's watch and see what I can do! Just let me.' Everytime I think I've done something well, I feel God telling me, 'If you would just let me have the reins, I'll show you what I can really do'. I think that is the only way to go with this adoption, is to let him completely control it. In all honesty, there is nothing I can do to control it. So I am sure there is a greater plan in the delay getting my dossier to China. About turning thirty. I'm a reflective person and I've thought back over the past thirty years and the life I've led. I have nothing to complain about, it's been a good life. But what have I really done for the Lord? How many people have I led to Christ? How am I furthering his kingdom? These questions have begun to haunt me and I want so much to glorify him in all that I do. I want to serve him and work diligently for him. Right now, most days I feel like I just exist, barely getting through the day. But that is not what Christ intended our life to be, there is so much more. Pray with me as I truly seek his will for my life and our family. Missions, Christian service in the business world or working in the ministry? How does God want my family to serve him? Not my will, but may your will be done, Lord.